A FUnnie look at the loony residents of the Democratic Underground aka DUmmies in particular and the Leftwing Blogosphere in general.
Wednesday, January 18, 2017
DUmmies Deeply Depressed Over Trump's Inauguration
The DUmmies are now in a state of complete grief over the impending inauguration of Donald Trump on Friday. Of course, their gloomy extreme depression is going to make watching his inauguration even MORE enjoyable than it normally would be. As you can see in the picture above of the OUTGOING gloomy White House staff, DUmmies and their leftwing cohorts cannot hide their extreme sorrow. You can see just how depressed the DUmmies are just by the very title of their thread, "Is everybody here in as shitty a mood this week as I am?" Yeah, everybody in DUmmieland is despondent but for us normal folks on the outside it is HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN!!! WOO-HOO!!!! So let us now read the hilarious DUmmie depression in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, breaking out the beer at high noon on Friday for the first time since I caught a bad cold last month, is in the [brackets].
Is everybody here in as shitty a mood this week as I am?
[I'm sure they are which makes it that much more enjoyable to watch.]
I'm pissed and I'm in mourning.
[I'm happy and laughing at you DUmmies. Speaking of which, let us now take a hilarious look at your fellow depressed DUmmies...]
I am grieving. I feel very bereft.
[Only 2922 more days of the Trumpocalypse.]
Going to the DC March ... Will get some good energy there
[Not if you hang out with violent protesters. All you would get then is a broken skull while splayed out on the jail cell floor.]
I can't come out of my bad funk.
[You will snap out of it after the 2922 days of the Trump era. Then immediately return to your bad funk when you realize there will be 2920 days more of the President Pence terms.]
I'm gonna have this funk for a loooooooong time. Pretty much always.
Last night I watched a documentary about Election Night and I just got really angry. For some reason yesterday I was the most angry I have been since this happened.
[That's strange. The same Election Night documentaries put me in an extreme upbeat mood from laughing at all the snowflake meltdowns. They are HILARIOUS!!!]
I've been in a shitty mood for the last 10 weeks. I don't expect it to get better in the near future.
[At least 2922 more days.]
Yes. Same with me and Mr. Gaia. I don't see any light at the end of this tunnel, nor any silver linings anywhere, either. It's dismal.
[But will you be ready for another four Trump years after that? 2922 more days, baby!]
I'm sorry, but donald trump does not have the power to make my life shitty any more than Hillary would have had the power to make my life wonderful. Our day to day happiness is in our own hands and we alone have the power to make it shitty or happy. I do NOT give the trumpster the power to make my life shitty. I can do that all on my own if I so choose. I intend to go on being the happy successful person I've always strived to be. I am a little depressed this week, but not because of trump. ...AS far as trump goes, I hate him as much as anyone could, but I refuse to let him make my life shitty.
[Translation: Donald Trump has ruined your life and there is NOTHING you can do about it.]
This week, as I say, has been terrifically sad and depressing anticipating the hurt that is going to be brought down on people and the planet by trump ascending to the position of leader of the free world.
[Have you considered brick wall head bashing therapy?]
The first place to resist trump is by not allowing him the power to ruin your sanity.
[That ship sailed long ago.]
I am unable to function.
I plan to avoid all news sources this week, as I have been doing since 11/9, but even more stringently so.
[Better go into hibernation until Jan. 20, 2025.]
Not much is cheering me up - not interested in watching late night comedy - because it's just not funny what happened and what is about to happen. The news is a no no - no effing way will I torment myself like during the Bush years.
[You need to cocoon yourself until Jan. 20, 2025.]
I will never watch any news network ever again. I just can't bear the thought of that guy being called "president".
[Another DUmmie for extreme cocooning.]
I can barely work, I'm depressed and angry, sarcastic and deeply dark. I tend to take a global view of all things, but no matter what part or how much of the world I pay attention to, I see nothing but Trump-shit all over it for at least four years.
[At least but in reality eight years.]
Depressed, stunned, still not quite believing it's going to happen yet I know it will. This is a disaster of world shaking proportions. None of us is safe.
[I really would love to see a video of your Election Night meltdown.]
What do I do with this rage for the people I know who voted for him? Especially the ones who are supposed to be intelligent? I understand how he conned the deplorables with his lies, but these people I know who have done quite well under Obama-- I want to spit on them.
[Have you tried sticking your head in a bucket and screaming?]
I'm drained.. I wake up angry and go to bed angry. I have been trying to pace myself but there is something every minute and he hasn't been sworn in yet.
[Donald Trump has complete control over your tiny mind.]
I am . . . permanently pissed off with no intention to get over it.
[You will NEVER get over it for all eternity unto the end of time.]
a number of my friends report suffering from Trumpsomnia Last night fell asleep at 3.
[Their Trumpsomnia will last all the way thru the Trumpocalypse.]
After a long absence due to illness, I wandered back to DUmmieland today figuring to see threads in which they were embarrassed for embracing the laughable Donald Trump FAKE NEWS story perpetrated by BuzzFeed. However, instead of embarrassment over such an obviously phony story, they are now wallowing in yet more FAKE NEWS where Trump supposedly cavorted with hookers in St. Petersburg hotels. Yeah, right. Trump already explained how if a prominent person stays at a hotel in Russia or in many other places in the world, there are probably small cameras recording you for possible blackmail material. Remember James Bond boffing that hot Russian chick in "From Russia With Love?" And right behind the 2-way mirror, all the action was being filmed. I'm sure Trump had that movie in mind. Anyway, the DUmmies must think Trump is as idiotic as they are and would have fallen into that trap as you can see in this THREAD, "Just heard on BBC World News radio that trump had another hooker-hookup." So let us watch the gullible DUmmies swallow yet more FAKE NEWS in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thinking that hot "From Russia With Love" chick was worth getting blackmailed for, is in the [brackets]:
Just heard on BBC World News radio that trump had another hooker-hookup in St. Petersburg and in other hotels. Said the cooperation between Trump surrogates and the Kremlin in reporting on russian oligarchs in the US has been going on eight years. Said the russians had no need to use the kompromat because trump was cooperating with them.
[Ah! It MUST be true. Forward immediately to BuzzFeed and CNN.]
The reporter didn't say if it was more Golden Showers type stuff, just that russia has the goods on him from multiple hotel rooms in multiple cities, including audio.
Where's his wedding ring? Heard on radio this morning he wasn't wearing one at the "news" conference....
[Maybe he tipped one of the fictional hookers with his wedding ring.]
He wanted to watch the 2 girls together , then told them how terrible a show it was. He didn't actually physically rape her till later. Sounded like something he would do IMO.
[Oh, it's your OPINION? Then it MUST be true.]
It may well be that the Watersportsgate story is just scuttlebutt. However, I'd imagine Trump has been scouring his memory for what he got up to during any of his trips within the Russian sphere of influence over the years.
[I would say that the credibility of the Watersportsgate story is somewhere between nil and none.]
The flood gates (no puns intended) are open. Trump going down. Maybe not now. But sometime soon.
[The floodgates on DUmmie Generator's tear ducts will be wide open on Jan. 20, 2025 when President Trump turns the White House over to Mike Pence.]
The trickle is turning into a steady stream of information (pun intended)
[A flood of fake news that DUmmies are eagerly lapping up.]
OK, I would really like to have someone view the video or videos. Just to verify. I do not want to see or see a link or read or hear any details. I just want verification if they are real or not. PLEASE.
[Please, Blue Fairy. Please make this FAKE NEWS real. Please, Blue Fairy!]
Despite the pleadings of President Jed Bartlet, the Electoral College actually showed a net GAIN for Donald Trump over Hillary Clinton. As a result, the DUmmies have melted down even more than previously. They are in flat out BERSERK mode. Not only that they are demanding money for an effort to continue stopping Trump as you can see in their deranged thread, I don't fucking care where the money comes from - as long as it's legal. We are at war with the GOP. As you will see deranged DUmmies are also very FUnnie DUmmies. So let us watch the DUmmies in going full out BERSERK in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that the next 8 years of DUmmie angst looks to be quite hilarious, is in the [brackets]: I don't fucking care where the money comes from - as long as it's legal. We are at war with the GOP [Why don't you check with Skinner? Perhaps he can turn you on to some Clinton Cash.] for the future of democracy, and that will take EVERY legal tool/weapon at our disposal. [That's for the public record. In reality this DUmmie would have absolutely NO problem with taking illegal bucks.] I want legions of lawyers, ones who will use every trick in the book.
[So how did that Faithless Electors trick work out for you?] I want private detectives if we need them.
[Sherlock Holmes doesn't do idiotic politics.] I don't fucking care if the money for it comes from Soros, Gates, "Big pharma," or whatever. [How about Koch Bros?] I don't fucking care if it's 'tainted' with corporations. We are not, repeat NOT going to win this thing on $25 donations, especially if people at risk aren't going to have it to spare under Trump. [Inflation. Not long ago you were just $10 away from stopping Donald Trump.] If we unilaterally disarm financially out of 'disgust' we will lose this country. Appearing to be an "oligarchy party" won't matter if we are under fascist leadership. [Please report to your local Walmart detention center.] As Barney Frank said of taking corporate money for his campaign, then passing regualtions on Wall Street, "Someone can take you to dinner, and you don't have to sleep with them, even if people think you did." [Someone took Barney to dinner and franked him. And now to the other berserk DUmmies...] there used to be some good Irish Democrats who got things done. [Then they got honest jobs and became Republicans.] I hope the Mark Cubans of the country will put their money where their mouths are. I can donate a few bucks here and there but nobody listens to a few bucks. [I hate to break it to you but Mark Cuban is now making nice with Trump. Oh, and so is Carlos Slim.] I am going to be majoring in forensic investigation. I will use whatever tools are at our disposal to be able to fight GOP corruption. [CSI DUmmieland.] There are plenty of examples of someone outspending their opponent and losing. [Case in point: 2016 election when Hillary spent over double that of Trump and still LOST.] It is a depressing night tonight, with the EC votes in. Next month it begins with the probable fascist state. [The party begins 1/20.] By less than 80,000 votes in the Electoral College. If Comey hadn't dropped his two letter bombs she would have won. [Or if Wikileaks weren't released. Or if Hillary didn't campaign on a vacation schedule. Or if she had at least visited Wisconsin. Or if she didn't insult working class voters with glitterati showbiz performers on stage with her. Or if.....] It doesn't matter what you bring to a "gunfight" if you can't find your butt with two hands. [That sounds like a requirement for becoming a registered DUmmie.] Where do you stand on setting people up with hookers? [Market rate in Venezuela is only 100,000 Bolivars a pop. Cheap!]
Goniff the Thief aka Skinner aka David Allen aka Mr. Shelly Moskwa finds Trump alarming. What is really alarming is Skinner's outright deception and thievery. Mr. Even Handed spent years running DUmmieland in which the vast majority of the DUmmies were adamantly opposed to Hillary. And during all that time Skinner was secretly receiving campaign cash via his wife, Shelly Moskwa, who also acted as the treasurer for Her Heinous. In previous DUFU editions I provided links and documentation of FEC information revealing those Clinton Cash payments funneled to Skinner. Of course, NOT ONCE did that craven thief own up to his corruption. After the Election Day/Night shock, DUmmieland went down for a couple of weeks, supposedly hacked by the Russians or evil rightwingers. In fact, it was another Skinner Scam to raise cash to replace his losses due to the Clinton Cash pipeline being shut down. He really needed that money since with no more Clinton Cash and having stupidly caused most of the Sandernistas, the majority of the DUmmies, to go into permanent exile with the Jackals, Skinner is now desperate.
His desperation for $$$$ hasn't kept him from hypocritically getting up on his moral high horse. In this case he claims to find Donald Trump "alarming." You can see El Lobo expressing his deep concerns over Trump in his thread, NYT: Is Donald Trump a Threat to Democracy? No, Skinner, he isn't but he is sure a threat to your wallet. So let us now watch Skinner the Thief and the other DUmmies pontificate about Trump in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering how long DUmmieland will be shut down for another cash scam following the 2018 elections, is in the [brackets]:
NYT: Is Donald Trump a Threat to Democracy?
[NYT: One of the big purveyors of FAKE news.]
This op-ed on the New York Times does a good job explaining why I find Trump so alarming. Worth reading the whole thing...
[Maybe you can convince Pinch Sulzberger to send you cash to replace the Clinton Cash you kept secret from the DUmmies all these years.]
By STEVEN LEVITSKY and DANIEL ZIBLATT DEC. 16, 2016
Donald J. Trump’s election has raised a question that few Americans ever imagined asking: Is our democracy in danger? With the possible exception of the Civil War, American democracy has never collapsed; indeed, no democracy as rich or as established as America’s ever has. Yet past stability is no guarantee of democracy’s future survival.
[Democracy isn't collapsing but the NYT credibility certainly has.]
We have spent two decades studying the emergence and breakdown of democracy in Europe and Latin America. Our research points to several warning signs.
[Such as corruption via paying off leaders of blogs to secretly favor a certain candidate?]
The clearest warning sign is the ascent of anti-democratic politicians into mainstream politics. Drawing on a close study of democracy’s demise in 1930s Europe, the eminent political scientist Juan J. Linz designed a “litmus test” to identify anti-democratic politicians. His indicators include a failure to reject violence unambiguously, a readiness to curtail rivals’ civil liberties, and the denial of the legitimacy of elected governments.
[Hmmm... And WHO is now denying the legitimacy of an elected government by trying to convince presidential electors not to vote for the candidate (Trump) chosen by the citizens?]
Mr. Trump tests positive. In the campaign, he encouraged violence among supporters; pledged to prosecute Hillary Clinton; threatened legal action against unfriendly media; and suggested that he might not accept the election results.
[Again, WHO is not accepting the election results? Now on to the DUmmies still idiotic enough to remain in DUmmieland after Skinner's betrayal...]
He's already showing the world that HE is in charge and going to do whatever the hell benefits HIM. I expect a major threat to democracy.
[Yup, Trump is showing the world that he is already in charge. That just has to irk Obama since Trump as President-Elect has done more in a month than he ever accomplished in 8 years.]
I can't cite the source, because it was something I heard on a podcast (best of the left) but the same uncertainty was pervasive about Hitler. I'm not saying Trump is Hitler, it's just chilling to me that it was so unclear to many Germans what he intended. We know that Trump has no regard for his own words, how can he possibly have any regard for the constitution?
[Actually you are saying Trump is Hitler. And I'm saying that Skinner is Thief.]
tRump scares me and I'm not easily scared but his cretin has the hair on the back of my neck sticking straight out
[Assume fetal position and suck thumb!]
I have not been able to really relax since election day, it's never far from my thoughts. I'm hoping something can still happen to block him, but If His Idiocy actually is inaugurated, my retiring husband and I are seriously cconsidering leaving the country, at least for a year, to see how things shake out here, politically..I don't want to live under this guy..Like Michael
[Don't move to Mexico and expect to work since they actually do strictly enforce their immigration laws down there and foreigners are PROHIBITED from working.]
Elections hacked..this is the only way they won - They are ALL illegitimate - and the traitor Dems in congress..are you shitting me..from Mccaskill to manchin - I hope those who have the backbone sue the shit out of them...call it out...every day - enough of the PC crap - I wonder, if we, the American people with a conscience, could bring class action suits at every turn....
[Yeah, class action lawsuits will make it all better for you...in the Twilight Zone.]
YES He Is! Donald Trump, the Family of Donald Trump and the Presidency...of Donald Trump are CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGERS to the United States FOR MULTIPLE REASONS.
[Certainly a CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER to Skinner's wallet.]
This last election and the hacking of DU should show w/out a doubt that democracy is over for now.
[Newsflash for clueless DUmmies! DUmmieland was purposely shut down by Skinner in order to replace some of the cash no longer available to him from Crooked Hillary.]
This was and is a coup and Comey, Trump, and McConnell committed treason.
[While Skinner committed larceny?]
The fascist republicans with help from a foreign fascist government and a compromised radical FBI stole this election. They own all branches of this government post January 20 2017.
[On 1/20/17 all DUmmies at 12 noon must bend over, grab their socks, and hold that position while waiting for further instructions.]
The entire Republican Party is a threat to democracy. Not only that, a threat to our freedom and physical well-being.
[Will you break out in hives as Lena Dunham did on Election Night?]
It will not take much to turn us into the fourth Reich.
[This DUmmie is going to have a hard time surviving the 16 years of the Trump/Pence era only to find out that Obama was the LAST Democrat president.]
Whether we like it or not but we are gonna have to go high and work with trump because otherwise we would be inflicting even more damage upon ourselves.
[Somebody has to say it so I will... LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]
Col. Von Staffenberg, where are you?
[A not very subtle call for assassination from DUmmie muntrv? I repeat, DUmmie muntrv? Are you watching, Secret Service?]
And even the tech CEO's have nothing but silence.
[I bet that meeting yesterday at Trump Tower between You-Know-Who and all those tech titans had to have been painful for you to watch.]
Is any President who ignores the Constitution a threat to democracy?
Many DUmmies have now come to the acceptance stage of grief. Yes, they have accepted that Donald Trump will be president but, as a result, they will now withdraw from reality. Of course, will Trump utterly dominating the news, this will be quite a task so it will be fun to see how they can accomplish this. In the meantime we get a comedic sneak peak at how they are hilariously coping in this DUmmie thread, Seriously, it's just unbelievable how my friends are handling the day to day developments. So let us now watch the DUmmies cope with very unpleasant Trump reality in Boshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, predicting delectably delicious DUmmie tears on 1/20, is in the [brackets]: Seriously, it's just unbelievable how my friends are handling the day to day developments.
[Screaming helplessly into paper bags?]
I follow their posts on Facebook (For the ones I haven't unfollowed) and even the enlightened ones are going into deep denial or withdrawal from reality. I have one woman friend who is left-leaning who is withdrawing into Yoga zen, wishing away all the negativity from her life and focusing her attention on the positives of life. My military friends are suddenly praying to God to keep "toxic" people out of their lives. And one of them said it all with just one sentence on her timeline: "I just don't know."
[Dearest goddess Gaia...Make the Trump victory just a bad dream I can wake up from...NOW!]
How is everybody else coping with this calm before the storm?
[Yes, we need to also laugh at the comedic coping of your fellow DUmmies.]
The mountains are high and the emperor is far away. Old Chinese saying.
[I'll file that away with another Old Chinese saying: With six you get eggroll.]
Meditating and reading up on Canadian immigration policies.
[You will discover that Canada is pretty much frozen over except for the narrow strip near the U.S. border.]
Thinking seriously about Mexico. Cuts to Social Security and Medicare will make the final decision for me.
[Don't even think about working in Mexico because they strictly enforce their immigration laws as we are about to do starting 1/20.]
Well, if we all end up in Mexico, we can work together...to make Mexico great again!
[Try working in Mexico and you will be immediately DEPORTED.]
I'm not allowed to mention Trump to my mother. Following the election she decided she would stop watching the news and told me that I shouldn't talk to her about what he's doing. She's in her 70s now and I think this election was the last straw for her. She just wants to check out of politics.
[Just like this DUmmie wants to check out of reality.]
Same with my 75 year old mother. She will not allow anyone to mention He Who Cannot Be Named and won't let my father turn the news on. Which is a huge lifestyle change for both of them.
[Perhaps they should consider entering a fallout shelter for the next 8 years...only to emerge in the Pence Era.]
I've watched the news once a couple of weeks ago. It was actually the first time I had watched network news in many years and only because I was at a neighbor's house. I learned that it makes you less informed than if you had not watched it at all. Pure "Everything is normal with Trump's transition" propaganda.
[The Electoral College vote this Monday will be very tough for you. Except more withdrawal symptoms to follow.]
Kroger has some good buys on canned beans, so I stocked up a few dozen cans, on top of what we already have. And, of course, more rice since it lasts forever in storage and the two together make a complete protein.
[A diet of beans and rice to last you through the eight years of Trump. I'll be thinking of you as I dine on steak tonight.]
making hurricane candle holders, decorating my house like never before. Cleaning, organizing. Watching the Hallmark channel instead of the news. If I started writing about my worries, I don't think I could stay sane.
[I think you long ago crashed thru that sanity barrier.]
I think yoga and meditation are needed now, but not as a way to withdraw or wish away all negativity in the world. It 's more like a way to try to participate in reality without being swallowed up by fear and rage. Helps to figure out what really needs to be done and how to proceed.
[Incomplete unless you wear one of those dopey safety pins on your diaper.]
My wife and I have started to have discussions about moving to Australia or New Zealand. It's a remote possibility but one we've opened up.
[Or you could join the penguins in Antarctica.]
I am a bulldog. I will not give up. Even if it cost me my life. Via heart attack or whatever. Because so many of my friends and relatives have died and been wounded in combat fighting fascism. Their graves are being spat upon by the GOP. They are also spitting in the faces of Americans who voted for Hillary Clinton. I can safely say that 2.5 million more people plus the others who voted for Hillary are pissed. That is the majority. It's Theocratic corporate fascism we are facing. Mitch McConnell, Bob Corker, Lamar Alexander and all of the other GOP actors are treasonous cowards for letting this happen. Mitch McConnell was paid back by having his wife appointed to the cabinet. He blackmailed Obama by saying he would frame the situation with the CIA pronouncement that Russian hacking was involved. Rex Tillerson is even worse. Screw it all. I will not stop I will not give up. I don't care if it takes 4 years are 8 years are 200 years. I will never stand for this.
[Posted DUmmie Lint Head from the Rubber Room.]
Doing what I can emailing electors and such
[Are you one of those loons sending them death threats?]
Yeah it's gonna suck for at least four years. In the meantime pray for as little permanent damage as possible and focus on the next steps. It does little good to fantasize about revolutions, coups or impeachments that aren't going to materialize. Keep calm and know that this too shall pass.
[Try EIGHT years. And after that you will enter EIGHT years of the Pence Era.]
These problems are going to haunt us for the next century and it'll be because of four damned years of Trump.
[Again, EIGHT years.]
The only good news is that a presidency is only 4 years. No way is he getting another 4.
[The Democrat lineup for 2020 is Pocahontas, Plugs, Abs, and Giggles. No way it won't be 8 years.]
How much will Orange Julius destroy in 4 years?
[Half as much as Mango Mussolini in 8 years.]
Back to 7,000 for the market is my prediction.
[As good as your prediction of the inevitable Hillary victory.]
it's becoming an opportunity to enhance my Photoshop collage skills.
[But how are your Photoshop paintbrush skills?]
My wife and my Dad both have decided to ignore the news; she believes I'm obsessed, and he thinks I'm losing my sanity.
[They're both right.]
Panic attacks and a nervous twitch in the corner of my mouth.
[And on even number days...Drooling fits and a twitch in the corner of your tush.]
First few weeks I was emotional eating a ton of sugary stuff until I came down with bad cold/flu, so that was bad idea. I am now still recuperating from that on couch by fire watching lots of series and cheesey Christmas movies.
[Try gobbling down lots of Jelly Bellies and bingeing on "Gilligan's Island" reruns.]
Watching a lot of Star Trek and chanting "this too shall pass".
[Wouldn't the proper chant be "Live Long and Prosper?"]
Blue Fairy! Blue Fairy! Obama! Obama! Please stop Donald Trump from becoming President by any means necessary even if it is totally unconstitutional and would cause civil war.
Yeah, after all that lecturing during the campaign about the necessity of ACCEPTING the election results, the DUmmies and many liberals are NOT accepting the election results. So what to do to stop Trump? Anything! Anything! Anything! You can see the hilarious DUmmie desperation in this thread, President Obama can save this country. Your Blue Fairy will certainly save the day...NOT! So let us watch the DUmmies helplessly but hilariously pray for salvation from the coming Trumpocalypse in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, looking forward to getting his PredictIt money next Monday when the Electoral College verifies that Trump WON, is in the [barackets]:
President Obama can save this country.
[Naw! It would cut into his golf time.]
He needs to go on TV and speak to the nation. He has to lay out the interference by Russia in our democratic process, even at the risk of compromising sources and methods. He needs to go on to say an election that happened under the influence of such interference is a nullity. He should set a new election date. Then he should announce he has positioned troops around the country and called up the National Guard and he will not hesitate to declare martial law in the event of violence.
[You need to appear at your local Funny Farm and announce you are checking in for the next 2961 days of the Trump presidency.]
He will rank with Washington and Lincoln in the history of this nation if he does. If he doesn't we will have to fix things ourselves and it will be very messy.
[Is that a threat, DUmmie rzemanfl? I repeat for the Secret Service, DUmmie rzemanfl. Now on to his fellow desperate DUmmies...]
[Yup. And the blue tooth fairy will also leave money under your pillow for losing your mind.]
From your keyboard to some all powerful being's eyes.
I think they already said the results stand unfortunately.
I believe that if Mr. President knows information that the Russian's threw our election that he will do something about it. I do. He's a bad whammer jammer!
[At least we know your jammer got whammed.]
I wonder if he can recall all the Secret Service agents from NYC?
[I wonder if your mind lived thru birth.]
totally agree. He is putting every duck in a row, following rigorous legal procedure
before he takes action. That's his track record in office. And I like it!
[I would love to see this DUmmie's face on 1/20 when he discovers that Obama never played three dimensional chess.]
This is Obama, to a T. And it is one of the many reasons why I have such confidence in him.
It's not too late until the electors cast their votes dont give up hope!
[A whole week to go and already one faithless elector and a whole bunch of Hillary electors who have pledged NOT to vote for Trump.]
EC should postpone voting until all votes recounted in MI, FL, PA, WI. What's with the date? Dates can be postponed for various reasons and we have good ones.
[I hate to break it to this DUmmie but MI & PA recounts have been dismissed, FL recount never happened, and Trump has increased his lead in WI.]
And I do believe he can be a real bad ass and won't be surprised if he instills martial law for a time being. A friend who spent her entire career in the army told me she thinks that is what he will do.
[And the rest of her time was spent in the Rubber Room.]
He can declare a national emergency under the National Emergency Act.
[He can declare your vacuous skull a national emergency.]
I believe in him. I believe he will do the right thing.
You know, i think anything is possible. And there is so much we don't know.
[The second sentence are the truest words you ever typed.]
we know enough that the EC should postpone voting til after the recounts and Congressional investig. into Russian hacks.
[DUmmie wordpix better wear a very durable diaper next Monday.]
It would also help to arrest Trump. And call for new elections at the same time. I expect none of this to happen.
[A refreshing burst of reality at the end.]
Time for a little Jedi mind trick!
[May the Farce be with you!]
There are no election redos under our constitution. And President Obama is not a dictator. He has no power to nullify a national election.
EC needs to postpone voting til after Congress'l investigation & recounts
[Enjoying your visit to Fantasyland?]
Why set a date for a new election at all. With the massive hacking of the votes he could simply say that he was the last president elected by the people in a fair election. That no new election would be set until a point and time where voting could be guaranteed "hack free". For the vast majority of us we'd not have a problem extending his term out 2, 4, or even 8 more years. Then declare martial law and if the red staters revolted we'd crush them with our military. Perhaps in the next election their votes really wouldn't matter. It would be a win win or our party and real America.
[A DUmmie in his sandbox fantasizing about President-for-Life Obama.]
Has DU lost its mind? You don't cancel elections that have been held and certified. Who even has the authority to cancel an election? Would be a constitutional crisis with lots of violence and people leaving the country. Everyone knows that canceling prior elections, where no constitutional provision exists, is the Pandora's Box to dictatorships.
[But to answer your question---Yes, DUmmieland has lost its mind.]
My prediction is that the President will say and do nothing. And I hope I am incorrect on this, but nothing in the past eight years gives me any hope that what you write will happen. Plus, I cannot see how the Constitution would allow for this.
[A cold depressing splash of harsh reality. See you next Monday, DUmmies, for the Electoral College vote!]
I used to go to a really good sushi buffet in the Westwood section of Los Angeles. Nearby was the "Womyn's Bookstore." I can't tell you how much of a kick I got out of seeing that place since I found their artificial attempt to avoid the name "men" in their name quite amusing. Once in a while I would see a very angry woman, I mean womyn, enter the establishment but mostly the place was empty. I doubt it is still there but that whole "womyn" shtick still amuses me to the extent I am using it in the title of this DUFU edition. Also amusing is how "womyn" DUmmies are still mourning the loss of Hillary because she is/was/mightbe a female. The result is this DUmmie thread titled, No You Cant : Why Im Still Crying Over Hillary Clintons Loss. It starts out quoting a "womyn" comedy writer named Eirene Donohue. Nothing really comedic about her extreme grief except that it is so extreme as to be inadvertently HILARIOUS. So let us now watch the DUmmies grieve to the max over the loss of poor Hillary in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thinking this might be the funniest thing Ms Donohue has ever written, is in the [brackets]: No You Cant : Why Im Still Crying Over Hillary Clintons Loss.
[Yes We Can: Whey We Are Still Laughing Over Hillary Clintons Loss.]
[Check her IMDB profile. Worked on something unknown years ago and is still working on something like "I Was A Teenage Vampire."]
I am her. The words flashed through my head. And suddenly, there on the 101 freeway, I was down the hole again. Tears streaming, sobs choking, heart breaking. The realization hitting me. I am Her.
[You are Her? Did your butt suddenly break thru your pantsuits?]
And here was the root of my pain. This wasn’t just about the disappointment that my candidate lost. Or the fear of what Trump will do to this country. It felt like my very soul hurt and I realized that it was because of what this election said to me as a woman. It said no.
[No. You are now officially worthless all because Hillary lost.]
No, woman, stay in your place. No, woman, you are not good enough. No, woman, no matter what you do, you will not win, you will not be the boss of me.
[A tragedy if you are a womyn "comedy" writer in L.A.. For a woman harvesting rice with mud up to her knees in Bangladesh...she has bigger problems to deal with.]
It crushed a part of my female core to realize that yes, the world at large really does hate women that much. And while there are other reasons to dislike Hilary Clinton and disagree with her policies, misogyny and sexism are the gas that fuels the fire they burned her with.
[Hillary as Joan of Arc being burned at the stake? Naw! That scenario doesn't work for me.]
We are supposed to stay quiet and not ask for much. Stay in our place and say please and thank you and don’t challenge anyone. We must be perfect, ten times more perfect than the man beside us. And then we must wait for them to give us permission to follow their orders.
[Advice to guys. Avoid this womyn like the plague or you risk the loss of your bolitos. Now on to the the Drama Queen DUmmies mourning the Hillary loss...]
Tears are flowing... No Words
[I got a word... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!]
Until we stop being 10's or unless we're flat chested and thus automatically excluded because it's very hard to be flat chested and be a 10.
[Would you like a coupon for falsies?] I feel let down Especially by the women who voted for that creep. It hurt me physically in a way, i'm tired, sore, have had three infections in the past month... I almost give up. [And don't forget about that ingrown toenail you suffered all because Hillary lost.] It's been hard. I've finally made it to the acceptance stage of grief, but I too have gotten sick, run a fever, and felt terribly depressed. [Good news. You are now only one step away from the despair stage of grief.] I'm still locked in anger, and lashing out at former family... former friends.. I have resorted to misogynistic insults, ageist insults, racist insults, and all manner of banter that before November 8th would have and did appall me.
[I bet you were a barrel of fun at the Thanksgiving table.] I have called women who support trump a "4" and/or a "hag" and have told them they voted for him, they no longer have a voice because they are just women. [So you are now treating women the same way that Eirene the mostly wannabee comedy writer is accusing Trump supporters of doing.] I have told elders that supported him, whose profiles say they are retired that they should just off and die because they are beyond their years of being productive citizens in tRump's 'merika. That I hope theirs is the first medicare and social security to get cut out.
[Somebody needs to check if this DUmmie works in a hospital.] I have used the most base and despicable insults against the wives, or children of men on social media who supported trump [Keep going. The District Attorney is copying your own testimony to use against you for your impending internet child bullying trial.] I have told school teachers who supported him that I hope they lose their jobs or at the very least have their income severely slashed. [I guess you missed your rabies shot.] I am disgusted with my behavior on social media, but fuck it, logic doesn't seem to sink in with these dipshits who have voted against their own interests, maybe some of the disgusting medicine that they supported being used against them and the ones they love will finally get through to them. [Posted DUmmie Amimnoch from the Rubber Room. I repeat for the authorities, DUmmie Amimnoch.] I flipped off and swore at a Bernie or Buster on the street. He was a complete stranger, but I overheard a phone conversation. Perhaps a break from social media would help? [Perhaps but you obviously are experiencing a break from reality.] Do not, at all costs, accept what has happened. Just have to live with it. If we get overwrought and have health problems from it all, then they have really won. [Your hilarious Drama Queen angst means we have really won.] I am having a hard time getting beyond denial... this is a crushing blow that not many men can understand [Many men understood that crushing blow that Madonna offered for Hillary votes which is one reason why she lost.] The fucking church and the Xian religion at its base is misogynitic, racist and bigoted. A patriarchal code set down by men for men, asserting that some supernatural being decided that's the way it is. Women are second-class cutizens. Property of men, in fact. Nope, religion is the problem. Your relatives would have had a better chance of voting for Hillary had they stayed away from church. [Let me make a wild guess here and assume you are not a member of the Pastor Charles flock.] The meaning of Jesus Christ? A fairly loathsome personage, at least as how he's depicted in the Buy Bull. [Is that you, Jennifer Palmieri?] I still cry. A couple times a week. [And after being featured in this DUFU edition, DUmmie trueblue2007, make that a couple of times a day.] I haven't really cried a couple of tears when I saw Kate McKinnon sing Hallelujah. [I cried a couple of tears of laughter when Kate sang these lyrics: "I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you."] I'm still grieving too and I will NEVER allow myself to call this situation normal. I wake up every morning with a pit in my stomach and an ache in my heart and head. But I'd rather live with that than to get to acceptance. I will always RESIST.
[WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] I am not a woman but I also took this loss personally I am the father of two daughters and I will never forget or forgive this loss [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] i'm hoping that when we go march in DC on 21 Jan, 2 of my sons will come along. My oldest son was mad because his wife and i went full speed ahead on the plans and he wasn't consulted enough. so i sent him an email with links to the march, and i said to him, I would love it if you came and marched with us. It has always been my belief that women's liberation is everyone's liberation.
[WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] Everytime I look at her I cry and say what could have been. It hurts. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] I will never forget and I will never forgive ANY Trump voters. But white females are the ones who gave me the deepest cuts of all. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] I still cry . . . a little every day. I just can't believe that people I know voted for that orange ass! I want to call them on it but they seem to ok with a the shit he and his kids have done since he won! Nothing to see here . . . No conflicts of interest . . . No draining the swamp . . . who cares if Russia messed in our elections . . . Nothing seems to matter. I pray that the Democrats do not cooperate . . . stonewall - the way they treated President Obama and his family for the past 8 years is beyond disgusting! I want Hollywood to ignore him . . . Designers not to dress her . . . News and entertainment reports to ignore them - they beg for fame - we need to starve them out! But more than anything we need to find someone within enough money to help establish voting machines in minority precincts make sure the vote is properly counted - we don't lose elections they are taken from us! [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] Male, here. And this post hits me hard. I've been a feminist since my teens -- I saw the Billie Jean King/Bobby Riggs match, listened to the crap that was being spewed all around me, and changed. She was going to be an EXCELLENT world leader. She was going to help. But the same forces that were spewing the same crap back in the 60's and 70's have hijacked reality yet again. There's going to be a significant body count this time, if we survive as a species. It was the worst possible decision for a nation to make. All because of deeply-held cultural misogyny. Misogyny so deeply embedded that it even sweeps up many women themselves in its dark primitivism. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] The loss will never be regained; the injury will never heal. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] I blew up at my husband about something trivial last night and broke down crying. It took me a little while to realize why. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] It has been said that depression is anger turned inward. I think it applies here. Depressed? Decide you are not going to take bullshit anymore. Call out every misogynist bastard, assert yourself. Not meanly, but firmly. Be demure? Get along at all costs? Be sweet? Kiss my ass demure, be strong, be yourself, call out inequities. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] Today is especially bad given the federal judge's reversal of the earlier ruling to recount in MI. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] I am her. Unfortunately, I'm a man. This election has made me decide that I am finally going to make the decision to become a woman!! I will honor Hillary for the rest of my life as a woman. I honestly can't stand being a man any longer if it means being anything like Trump. [LOL!!! I nominate the above by Hopeless1 as the FUnniest DUmmie post of the year! Oh, and where will you be mailing your bolitos to?] I am so stunned that this happened...that I have not even been able to cry yet. I wake up every morning and say to myself, "This cannot possibly be happening." It is all the more bitter that as fine an individual as President Obama is being followed by the worst of the worst of human dreck that is DFT (Donald Fucking Trump). [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!] I know the feeling. Took me 1 week to squeeze a few tears when I saw SNL Hallelluja opening. Floodgates still locked in though. [WINNING!!! Thank you, President Trump!]
I am a 30,000 year old reincarnated being who materializes once every 5000 years in a Las Vegas hotel suite. My greatest goal in my eternal life is to spend 6 months on a small tropical island with Mary Matalin doing nothing but pitching a DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert) deal with her. If you happen to be Mary Matalin, please contact me at:
firstname.lastname@example.org. If you are anybody else, you can contact me there too. Remember, if you are a book publisher, please feel free to embarrass me with an extravagant book advance.